Yom Kipur?

B"H

It has been a bit of a rough ride for me since Pesach, for reasons I won't go into here. Suffice it to say that life had its challenges before Pesach, but since then certain challenges have been thrown into high focus. (I can't help, then, but expect some great catharsis to coincide with Shavuot!) To keep my spirit in check I have been periodically pulling a pair of one angel card and one tehillim pasuk card out of the big bowl on our dining table. Sometime last week, I pulled the "Efficiency" angel and a blank posuk card, which I took as a signal to discipline my energies toward taking care of business and not spend further energy on my worries or these cards. Last night, however, I found myself dipping back into the bowl, and this is what came out:

Angel: Purification

Posuk: 101:2 -- ethaleykh b'tam-l'vavi b'kerev beyti (I will talk in the integrity of my heart within my house.)

Then I went to bed and dreampt of Yom Kipur! I can't recall ever dreaming of Yom Kipur before in my life, so this intrigues me. In the dream, it is erev Yom Kipur, the sun is just slanting over the horizon, and a small (for Yom Kipur) rag-tag assortment of people who I think I know and I think are mostly my peers are assembling in a space that somehow recalls both summer vacations and my junior high school cafeteria. R' Schachar asks me if I want to lead Maariv, and I volunteer. He asks if I have my kitel, which I don't. I fetch a machzor and ask him to review the liturgy with me. Now he is concerned that I'm not really ready to lead; but I am sure that I am. I just need to review the program and get my head on straight. As the sun sets outside, I feel a release begin within me and I weep.

Wowee!

In other news, Kyla has left the continent, and I have rigged a recording setup here at home, so that I can bear down and finish this bloody CD already. I have exactly one month. More on this as it develops.